How are you today, my friends?
These women I watched in the drama made me realize that I wanted a privileged life for either one of us. At this point, I could easily fall into a comparative trap thinking that it’s okay for movie stars to live this way, but not people in the healing and healing professions, but instead, I asserted my desire and let these women show me what was possible.
I didn’t want to be invisible and do what society said I was supposed to do, exclusively. I wanted to live an epic life on my own terms, just not on my own. I wanted to be feminine, strong, wealthy, generous and connected to the shakers and movers.
Are you here with me? I’ve had as much enthusiasm as I did for traveling around the world, living in a dream house, belonging in a vibrant society, and giving causes that are of interest to me. I wanted to experience everything. Taking advantage of the microwave popcorn and my new sparkling awareness, right there during the commercial break, I decided it was time for a career change.
- Create A Clear, Compelling Vision
- Remap Your Brain To Support Your Commitment
- Unlock The “Stakeholder Mentality” On Your Team
- Cultivate Trust As Your Center Of Gravity
- Build a Structure of What “Good” Looks Like
- Step Into Your New Role As A Conscious Leader
- Sustain Your Legacy With “Keepers Of The Flame”
Step 1: Create A Clear, Compelling Vision. Leadership Fundamental
- An ambiguous destination yields uncertain outcomes.
- How clear are you at your destination?
- What will be your biggest accomplishment?
- What would you want your legacy to be?
- What do you want the industry to think about your business in 10 years?
- What philanthropy ventures or passions would you like to fund?
- What would you want your potential role to be in your business for those nearing retirement?
You need to take authority over your choices, so the destination becomes your “True North” that you are steering towards every moment. Knowing what you want for your future is essential to the success of your business and personal life. It’s the basis of everyday decisions and priorities.
Step 2 SWOT analysis
In order to assess the consistency of their goods and to improve their poor areas, SWOT analysis is typically performed by organizations. Do a SWOT review, which is essentially designed to assess your strengths and weaknesses, as well as the opportunities open to you and the challenges that could hold you back. Qualities such as commitment, sense of duty, compassion, persuasiveness, integrity, bravery, drive, imagination, self-motivation, good health, optimism are your strengths. Your vulnerabilities include anger, self-doubt, anxiety, pessimism, lethargy, poor health, lack of motivation, hesitation, etc. Your threats may include life conditions such as lack of resources, lack of expertise, lack of knowledge, and experience.
Take a Personality Test
Although taking a personality test might not help you discover your abilities and inborn skills, it will help you get one step closer to self-awareness. Many personality tests concentrate on areas such as how you communicate with the world and surroundings; how you make a decision; and what kind of atmosphere you want to work in. Knowing this will help you gain a greater understanding of your personality in terms of what works for you and what doesn’t work for you.
Step 3 Unlock the team’s “Stakeholder Mindset”
What are some of the values you live by?
What do you stand for?
How do you describe yourself?
How do your friends describe you?
What makes you special and unique from others?
What are some of your strengths and how have they helped you grow so far in life?
What are some of your weaknesses and how have they hindered your progress so far?
Which traits, if you acquired them, would help you improve personally and professionally?
What do you feel passionate about?
What are some of the most important things in life?
What are some achievements you are proud of?
Describe your ideal self.
What does it mean for you to be self-actualized?
What do you aim to achieve in life?
Step 4 Cultivate trust as a centre of gravity
You need to know what your goals are related to every aspect of your life, namely your personal life, having goals related to spiritual and emotional growth, your relationship with your friends and family, and the role you play in society, and then your professional life, where you will have goals related to your work, education, and finance, to achieve full fulfillment.
Identify the most critical areas that you can constantly work on, calculate, and progress in your life both personally and professionally. When designing a plan, define areas that you consider important, however, bear in mind that there may be areas that do not require your immediate attention but are still important.
How did those fabulous ladies do that? They weren’t playing by the rules; they weren’t “one of the guys”; they weren’t asking, “Who am I to be so successful? “And they’re certainly not living in the terror, shortage, and limitation that I’ve started to get with it.
These women did not dim their brightness, exuding femininity and power, by pretending to be less wise, less fierce, or less capable of making money so that those around them might not feel threatened. They did all of it; why couldn’t I? I’ve accomplished a meaningful career component, but not a lavish lifestyle income.
Step 5 Build a Structure of What “Good” Looks Like
The thing about leadership, training, and execution is that everyone understands what they need to do to get where they want to be. They are well aware of their potential and the purposes of their lives.
What they don’t know is how to conquer the obstacles that are stopping them from living the life they’re dreaming of and reaching the goals. There are behavioral and attitude challenges that hamper our progress, in addition to the usual suspects that hinder our success, such as lack of skills and resources.
VISUALIZE YOURSELF AS HIGHLY EFFICIENT
Another shift in behaviour that can help you be more successful is simply visualizing yourself as a highly productive human. When you think of yourself as inefficient, you leave space for errors and call for inefficiency throughout your lifestyle.
The idea need not be ideal, but to be your most productive and efficient self. Levitate generalizations when describing your actions and abilities – whether good or poor. The loss in one area of life does not predict your success in other areas of your life. Offer suggestions rather than generalizations.
Instead of saying, “I’m bad at coordinating and managing a team,” say, “I need to build a program to properly manage my team.”
Step Into Your New Role As A Conscious Leader
Learning how to learn is life’s most important skill.
– Tony Buzan
Life management is not limited to setting achievable goals. It is about change and growth, and being your most productive self. The aim of preparing and setting objectives is to help you get closer to the dream you set yourself while identifying your ideal self.
You will quickly exceed all the preceding standards of achievement with patience and relentless effort. The thing is that you already have the talents and abilities you need to master life, all you need to polish them, and that’s where the learning of skills comes in.
You’re the best investment of your own. To learn the abilities that will help you ascend the success ladder, spend all your time, effort, and money on your own.
Aim for clarity
Having excellent communication skills does not mean you’re a great public speaker or an outstanding writer. What you have to be able to do is to express your point with utter assurance and consistency to be considered a successful communicator, leaving no space for uncertainty. In fact, the ability to communicate your ideas to your audience and let them hear what you’re saying is one of greatest indicators of success.
Communicating assertively simply means conveying your thoughts and feelings to others, assertively yet in a loving and respectful way. The more you articulate yourself freely and reasonably, the more your chances of being understood are.
Being assertive must never be about dominating others or manipulating each and every part of the channel of communication. Assertively communication simply means acknowledging the right to be heard and understood by all, and that is what your main objective should be when communicating.
Listen to understand (rapport building)
Listening carefully, and most importantly listening with the intention of understanding, and without judgment, is the secret to developing a friendship with the person you communicate with.
The secret to good communication is to establish relationships where all parties realize that when they share their concerns or ideas, they will be closely listened to with the intention of listening rather than reacting. It may be your family, your boss, or your associates. Listening and consulting others with respect and consideration not only demonstrates that you care, though in turn, you also earn respect.
Step 7 Sustain Your Legacy With “Keepers Of The Flame”
ACCEPT THE RESPONSIBILITY TO DO WHAT MUST BE DONE
Establishing goals is just a start. Feeling responsible for your goals and then taking on the challenge to accomplish them is another challenge. Realize that you will have to face a lot of hurdles and your journey isn’t going to be a smooth glide. There will be times when you won’t be moving as fast as you expected. In that time, you’d have to power through it all no matter how bad it looks.
IDENTIFY THE RESOURCES ESSENTIAL FOR REACHING YOUR GOALS
Identify and list the resources you’d need to reach your goals – time, money, knowledge, additional education? Is there a particular person who can help you? List all the resources you deem are important to reach your goals.
BE WILLING TO ASK FOR HELP
Don’t hesitate to let other people (who can assist you) in on your plans. If someone you know can assist you in some way then ask them to help and assist you if they can without feeling embarrassed or shy. You can always return their favor in some other way later.
ELIMINATE THE INTERRUPTIONS THAT BLOCK YOUR PROGRESS.
Learn to manage your time effectively so you don’t end up spending all your time on trivial and unimportant things, because most of the tasks that take up our valuable time have the appearance of urgency and seem to be important, but are in fact just trivial matters
BE FLEXIBLE TO UNKNOWN CIRCUMSTANCES AND HURDLES
Regardless of all the planning and preparation, nothing makes you immune to the unknown and unexpected that can sometimes hinder your progress but can also sometimes facilitate your journey. Whenever an unforeseen obstacle befalls
I know you’re told by a lot of people to “just be satisfied with what you have.” And I also know how dull it sounds to you. It’s nice of your life. And you’re so thankful.
On this earth and in this lifetime, you have a beautiful, inspiring, and meaningful role to play. You have more important things to do than just existing ones, trying to keep up with your accounts, household responsibilities, exercise schedule, and the number of days that you need to let your dog out.
Maybe you never realized that your calendar could sparkle with pleasurable tasks and meetings with lovely people as a queen. Stick with this Queen concept, and you’ll never be forced to wear a navy blazer, name tag, or apron, and go to work on your monotonous job again.
Either you’re resigning yourself to the boring relationship you’re staying in for the children’s sake, or you’re going to be content with living in the same postcode and never leaving town because that’s where the family comes from. I know how soul-sucking any kind of settling for smart, lively, sexy, outrageous women like us is, whatever your version of a “good life.”
There’s nothing wrong with you. You’re not crazy. You’re not inept. You may be following some really bad advice from some really well-meaning people. Or maybe you’ve been so overwhelmed that you’ve gone unconscious in constant “busy” mode. Either way, that’s just because Queen-hood and all of her glory hasn’t been modeled for you, or at least not at the level you crave. And because we’ve believed in the limited ways that status quo conformists have instructed us to behave and think, we then feel wrong, guilty, or even ashamed for desiring what we’ve naturally been designed for. If you’re feeling unsure about how exactly to access this greatness within so you can make a difference in the world, experience financial relaxation, and live your bigger life, keep reading. You’re exactly where you need to be.
It’s time to start dreaming big again! And it begins with those little-girl dreams. What were they? For most women I know, these are the memories you can turn to that leave plenty of clues on where to begin today. The first step is to explore what your desires were and likely still are, whether on a hobby basis or full-blown life-purpose path. Dreaming big is a mindset, and this mindset is the necessary foundation for you to live your epic life. What lit you up when you were young? What did you love doing so much that the time just flew by and you couldn’t get enough of it? Who were you or weren’t you around when you felt happiest?
As you start to recall the people and places that have left traces and the meaningful moments that fed your soul, write them down. Now take a look at how they can translate into your adult life today. Maybe you loved playing dress-up in Halloween outfits. That could be a sign to send out invites and host a themed dinner party or finally tell your parents you’re quitting pre-med and enrolling in Parsons to pursue fashion design. Or if you were more of the artsy type and loved drawing, it’s likely time to enroll in a painting class or, if you want to think even bigger, look up who’s teaching watercolor along the Arno, treat yourself to that Tuscan experience next summer, and create the treasures that galleries will sell on your behalf. Once you’ve gotten clear on some of your desires, next comes believing that something more is not only possible for you, it’s actually meant for you. This is more than a nice thought, a hope, or a wish. It’s having full faith that your clientele is designed to support you in making your highest contribution in the world.
Every woman must cultivate a deep belief inside herself that her desires matter and can be manifested, so that she can live her calling. As Queens, we must become our own number one advocate on behalf of our dreams. Why? Because it’s about more than just you. With every epic life comes a “double blessing.” When you show up confidently, fully expressed and modeling what’s possible, it by definition blesses you and those lives that you positively affect. Think about anyone you’re inspired by or look up to who’s living the epic life. Their lives are full of abundance and blessing, and as a result of them stepping into their greatness, you have been blessed too. Lastly, for the epic life to move past fantasy and into reality, it takes not just the courage to think big but the audacity to take immediate action.
Anyone can create a Pinterest board, but it’s the Queen who decides to take inspired action in the direction of her dreams. This can look as small as buying an ice cream maker to start testing recipes or as grand assigning the lease on your brand-new gelato shop. If you don’t know what you desire just yet, don’t worry; trust that you have a calling, and know that if you commit to taking action on the steps in this book, you have the ability to discover what it is. It is the Queen within who has the answers for what your epic life looks like as well as how you will fulfill it. And you’re about to meet her. You, too, have been designed for greatness, darling. Don’t you doubt that? No one else is more important, more talented, or more capable. The entelechy within you proves that. No one else has a grander destiny than you. I promise. You’ve been designed perfectly and for an extraordinary purpose.
What a relief to be reconnected with the truth: that you can be, do, and experience life in the extraordinary ways you’ve always known to be possible! It’s important that you nurture, deepen, and maintain this stellar mindset, as it is your foundation for all that is to come. And until thinking big becomes your natural state and default mode, be compassionate with yourself. You’re human, my darling, which means that while you’re creating this new way of thinking, it’s normal to wobble in wondering if you have what it takes, and you may even temporarily plummet emotionally, thinking your task at hand is too hard.
Keep in mind that living a life of greatness isn’t just about you experiencing life at its fullest, it’s also about you contributing and making a difference in this world. Everything we build on together in this book from here on out will be rooted in the idea that all things are possible, not just for others, but for you as well.
No longer will you need to dim your light from your bigness, make yourself wrong for wanting more, feel insecure because others will think your idea is crazy, or hold back in any way from outlandishly playing full out in this one precious life you’ve been given.
- Wear the Versace at home in the middle of the day.
- Raise your rates, value yourself enough to take out a loan.
- Invest in your side hustle, ask for the promotion before you’re 100 percent comfortable.
- Don’t answer the phone when your toxic black-widow mother-in-law calls.
- Book the trip to see the blue lagoon in Reykjavik, have the break-up conversation lovingly yet unapologetic-ally.
- By all means, don’t let another year go by without confirming your attendance at the Biennale in Venice.
- You’ve been designed for the epic life; it’s time to claim it.